2020 ya pr*ck!!

A very delayed update of what’s happening, not that anyone reads this waffle!!

So obviously Race Across America was cancelled. The plan was to tackle RAAM, give everything we have to finish it then return to pretending to run! But when you can’t control what’s beyond you (like some fucker eating an undercooked bat!) you have to adapt and adapt quickly. I knew RAAM was going to be cancelled but when it happened it hit me harder than I thought it would. It knocked the bollox out of me for a couple of weeks to be honest. Couldn’t look at the bike even though I was in the best shape of my life on it. Saying that though, while the legs were great and the head was mentally ready for the worlds toughest race, which I thought would be impossible, physically the other body parts like the neck, hands and feet still aren’t right after Race Around Ireland. I’m full sure Shermers would have kicked in after a couple of days so at least now I have an extra year to get that somewhat right.

Thankfully all my sponsors have stuck with me so I pulled up my big boy pants/bib-shorts and got back training. I owe it to them and I owe it to the Alzheimers centre in Navan. So with that I have made a pathetic return to running, I even did a couple of those tempo run things ye Strava geeks talk about!

Kerry Way Ultra in Sept is the next race. A 200km non stop mountain run along the Ring of Kerry.

Then I’m planning a wee fundraiser after that probably in October for the Alzheimers centre as part of my RAAM efforts. Ye all expect something big from me nowadays. I was thinking along the lines of drinking 3000 pints of porter, one for each mile of RAAM but I’m a hoor for the hangovers. So I started thinking about Everesting somewhere strange like Mamore Gap but its feckin miles away. So I’ve decided to DOUBLE Everest the Hill Of Tara. 244 reps non stop!!! I’ll keep ye informed!

After that then I head to England early January to take on probably the toughest Ultra in the world. The Montane Spine race. 418km non stop mountain run in the positively balmy conditions of the Pennines in winter!! No sleeping in beds, no support and no fuckin idea who or where I am. I honestly can’t wait for it!!

Then we might give the Malin to Mizen record a wee go before leading back to where I should be going next month and that’s FINALLY taking on the worlds toughest bike race in the Race Across America. 5000km non stop, cycling 22hrs a day. Then it’s time for sweet sweet retirement because the way I see it if I’ve done the toughest run race and the toughest bike race and IF I finish them both then what else is there to do!

As always, if you want to keep up to date follow my ChasingBreaking_GrahamMacken and Spun Cycles & Spun Run. Pat from Raven Photography is making a documentary about my RAAM attempt and possibly my Spine Race attempt which will make for over18 only viewing I’m sure! If my wee races motivate you or if you ever want any info, advice or help with races just shout! If its fuckin Ghandi quotes ye are after I’m not your man!! There’s enough of that shite on Insta!!

Keep an eye out for the Double Everest challenge. You are more than welcome to join me for a few reps!!

G’lack!

Race Around Ireland Solo

How or where do I start to try explain the madness of Race Around Ireland and one of the greatest weeks of my life. Eight time solo finisher of RAI and seven time RAAM finisher Valerio Zamboni claims it’s mile for mile the toughest bike race on earth such are the constant drags, brutal roads and horrible weather.

I have literally been floating since the finish line, possibly due to not being able to feel my feet but still!

Some folk reckoned I wouldn’t be able for the race and some even stated I shouldn’t be attempting it. I haven’t ‘earned’ it yet as I had never raced solo before. I guess a 2man RAI in 2015 with the third fastest time that still stands was a fluke and becoming the first Irish 2man to finish Race Across America 2017 was a bigger fluke. My wife, family, friends and crew believed in me with absolute certainty, I was still trying to convince myself.

Before I left for the start line I rang John Ginty the sports psychologist. He had saved my race and head a couple of weeks previous so I don’t know why I was ringing him except out of courtesy. He is amazing to listen to down the phone, Christ he’d have Boris believe he can still pull this Brexit bollox off with a quick call. He reassured me I was ready, he told me there’ll be good thoughts in green writing and bad thoughts in red writing that will pop up all week. “Only fucking green writing Graham, do you hear me. Only fuckin GREEN”!! I was ready to run through a wall!

The start came about very fast, the lads assured me I was ready so off I went to find Lauren and the babies. Safe to say there was no other solos with a 2 year old and a 2 month old and they weren’t changing nappies before the start! I’ll get my thanks in for Lauren now as I know she’s reading this saying “the gobshite still hasn’t mentioned me or his kids”!! Joke!! She has been incredible, I genuinely don’t think she gave out once about all the training, she made sure the babies were fine and allowed me to do what was needed, I had every excuse to withdraw from the race but her support and more importantly her belief I could do it was the real reason I performed beyond what I ever thought possible.

Off the ramp I rolled with Coach Bernards big head in my ear. “Watch the heart rate Graham, do as he says. It’s a long week, don’t blow it now”. I felt brilliant for the whole day. 5pm to 5pm and covered 560km. Once we left Malin we stopped into my parents for a bite to eat and then faced into a two day headwind and lashing rain. It was a long day trying to get out of the North, I now know how the diesel launderers felt trying to make an impossible quick escape! Made it out and into Sligo, through to Leitrim with its endless rolling hills, horrible weather all night through Mayo and torrential rain in Galway. Bressie(no not that Midlands spoofer) but Ciaran Breslin had drove from Navan to Galway just to cheer me on and drove back home. Amazing gesture and just when i needed it most. Lauren and the babies were waiting in Oranmore to say hello so I put the foot down.

Clare, around Spanish Point and the cliffs of Moher was beyond brutal and where a couple of the solos had the sense to quit! Got to Limerick and with a block headwind nearly breaking me the sign said ‘Tralee 94km’ I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, those few hours bursting myself and getting nowhere were torture.

I kept telling myself to get to Kerry and the mountains await, I love climbing. As soon as I got to Kerry the sun came up and I came to life. So much so that I only went a won the Ciaran Smith award for King of the Mountains for the toughest section of the race! At the start of it, 3rd place was 40km ahead of me,by the end he was only 2km ahead and I chased him down and into 3rd just before Sneem. I didn’t even know I was on that section(I didn’t know what fuckin year it was), I stopped to upload a post to social media, I gave Lauren a quick call and we stopped and had a sandwich and coffee before ringing in the time station so we really put the foot down on the section and I am truly honoured to win that award. As Andy Reilly said “just put a mountain in front of him and he’s happy”.

Leaving Kenmare and heading for the labyrinth that is Cork I started to feel a bit of pressure build in the back of the neck, I said to myself ‘I wonder if that’s what Sher‘……and the neck was gone. The dreaded Shermers neck. All the muscles in the back of the neck fail and your chin is stuck to your chest. Cycling is difficult when you can’t see where you’re going! Trying to lift my head was impossible. It was like Vanessa Feltz was sat on it eating a curry cheese chips!!

I didn’t panic (“green thoughts Graham“), I just spoke to the lads in the radio and said “Tell Brendan I have Shermers neck”…….”Shumers wha?”……”Shermers Neck!!”…….”how do ya spell it”…….”Just fuckin ring Brendan!!“. And off the lads set to try sort it. Over the next couple of hours we tried several different contraptions , all the while I was cycling with one hand on the bars and the other rested under my chin holding my head up. Eventually they came up with something that was painful to wear but allowed me to become the first ever finisher with Shermers neck. That was the crews Ciaran Smith award. Never been done before but my lads sorted it. They were absolutely fucking flawless.

I lost around 10hrs because of the neck and hands, I was told i was faster than 2nd place on every section from Kerry home but we kept having to stop to adjust the headgear and I had lost about 80% of the use in my hands at this stage. I had to climb on the Bianchi because I could only use it’s gears but had to descend on the Colnago because I could only use it’s brakes. Due to hours of trying to look up the road through my eyebrows I essentially went crosseyed for the last two days. I had double vision. I was riding close to the edge of the road to let the oncoming cars overtake the other car. Only there was no other car……..the lads would say to pull in on the hard shoulder to adjust the dislocated head ‘re-attacher and I’d swing into the big wide hard shoulder only to be told it’s a single yellow line and I can’t stop there. They assured me the vision would come back. The uncertainty in their voices was clear for all to hear!

Cork seemed never ending, I think we were nearly a full day in the place. All I wanted to do was get to Waterford City, I had friends waiting for me and Davys brother Neil from The Arch Coffee shop had opened just for us with the finest cup of coffee you can find. I could have cried! I thought it was very generous of them to stay open a bit late for us, having no idea it was 1 am! This race truly brings out the best in people. I have rode Waterford home a couple of times training for RAAM so to finally be on a familiar route was brilliant, or so I thought……

Hallucinations were in full flow at this stage. There were hands flopping out onto the edge of the road reaching for me. I knew i was only imagining it but I was still making sure I was nowhere near them! Then it was like being inside a Pixar/Disney factory, the figures, animals, shapes and colours i was seeing in the trees and ditches was mind blowing. I’ve never done drugs but I might just start so i can have those hallucinations again……or I could just do RAAM solo!?!? There was post race hallucinations but I’m keeping them to myself!

The last night through Waterford/Wexford was the hardest night. Bernard had told me he wanted me to bury myself that night on the bike, pull well clear of 4th place so we could enjoy the last day on the road home. By the time the sun came up we pulled from two hours ahead to five hours ahead. Bernard and Davy were high fiving me, saying it was the greatest, most powerful night shift they’ve ever seen and I don’t remember a fucking bit of it. I was fast asleep on the bike for that whole night. People don’t believe me when I say I sleep while cycling but I do. That whole night there was two strips of light either side of my eyes and any time I edged close to one of them the brain would wake me up a bit so i could straighten the bike and then I would be back asleep in total darkness save for the two strips of light. When things got really bad and I drift off into a proper R.E.M sleep on the bike the lads would see my legs stop peddling and they would beep the horn or crackle the radio in my ear to wake me up. I don’t remember much else of that night except the sun was up and we were heading for home. We battled on through to Wicklow, looking forward to all the big climbs. The sun hadn’t helped though, i fell asleep going up Slieve Maan and the Shay Elliot!! We got over the Sally Gap with only one climb left around Kilteel. A hundred odd kilometers from home and i wasn’t sure if I had the energy to get there. I started to panic inside a bit as i could feel it slipping away from me. I couldn’t stay awake, I had no use of my hands and my eyes and neck were gone. Coming up to Kilteel I was convinced I was in the Phoenix Park, there was a long stone wall similar to the park. I was trying to find a gateway to the Castleknock gates so I could get on the Navan rd. I kept stopping or radioing back to the lads saying “there’s a gate, there’s a way out to the Dublin Rd“. “Graham what are you on about, just keep cycling until we tell you to turn, we don’t need to find the Dublin Rd”. I was honestly holding on to the race by a thread. I had essentially lost power in my shoulders/chest. Whenever i tried to take a drink or eat on the bike i didn’t have the power to hold myself up with one arm and it kept buckling from under me. “Nearly there Graham, green thoughts, steer with you chin if you have to!”

The next hour or so through Straffan and Kildare was the longest hour of my life. But as we were nearing Kilcock we started to see some familiar faces on the sides of the roads and the legs were back. There was a few from the 8man team from Trim in Kilcock to greet me. From Kilcock, through Summerhill and Dangan will live with me for the rest of my days. The crowds and support was just incredible. Dozens of cars leapfrogging us the whole way to the finish, all the kids in Dangan and Louise Hayes with the Japanese Flag!!!!!! I was full blown Japanese at that stage but it was totally worth it for that homecoming! Into Trim and down to the finish line and I couldn’t tell you how many people were there. It was just incredible and I’ll be forever grateful to you all for coming out and cheering us home.

I’ll never be able to explain just how difficult the race is. It’ll get a couple of chapters in the book though! It stripped me of everything I thought i knew about myself. Some people understand what i managed to achieve. Racing, competing and beating full time athletes while I work two jobs with two young babies and trying to finish off a house build. There was never enough hours in the day. Some understand and some just have no clue. Overheard during race week was ” that Graham fella is doing fairly shite, he’s going to be more than a day behind the 8man teams, whats the point like”. That was said in front of two of my patients…….I shit you not…….imagine even thinking that, never mind saying it out loud. Some people understood what we achieved and some people are just thick as mince!

I won’t doubt myself again though, there isn’t a race on earth that scares me now although that in itself is terrifying! I didn’t think anything could be worse than 2man RAAM with the extreme heat and fuck ups that happened but yep, RAI solo was way worse but i absolutely loved it and still managed a few smiles everyday. When the crew weren’t around to see me though, I’ll be honest, I broke down to myself several times. Not out of fear of not finishing as that was never going to happen but just through the sheer pain the body was in from head to toe.

Anyway……there’ll be nothing left for the book so enough waffle.

If you’re serious about racing and getting the best out of yourself you could do far worse than contact Our Lord and Saviour Bernard Smyth from Ultimate Conditioning in Trim, he got me into the greatest shape of my life. There is nothing he doesn’t know when it comes to pushing the body to its limits and having his authoritarian approach to nutrition and fueling during the race is essential, even if I hate him during the races!

I’ve asked Andy Reilly to do one of his famous race blogs from a crew perspective. I told him to make it warts and all. Except maybe the part about the first night when he was standing there in the rubber gloves and my father in law Brendan with two bottles of Celtic Pure water wanting to hose down the salt from my posterior!!! “I’m still able to wipe myself lads, ye are grand…..for now”!!

But that’s just a marker of the crew that came with me. I told him to put in all the giving out I did. He said I didn’t give out once on the race, I jumped out of the van every time I was woken up, I was a joy to crew for apparently. I asked Brendan and he said the same. That I did no moaning or giving out and that RAAM Graham and Solo Graham were chalk and cheese. I must have been doing all the name calling and giving out in my head!

The legendary crew……Crew chief Brendan can put his hand to anything, can function on no sleep and his love and enthusiasm of Ultra Cycling and seeing me suffer knows no bounds. Andy being a top endurance athlete himself keeps everything running smoothly and without knowing it himself but even just a slight nod of approval from him during the tough times was enough to get me up any mountain. Emmet is my General, nothing to do with him being a Nordy but he has been with me through all the Ultra races starting back in 2015. Genius mind and I couldn’t do these races without him. Davy is the voice of calm and reason. He had to leave halfway through as his daughter was having her first day of school, he saw her through the door and rushed back to meet up and crew again. His commitment and want to help me was incredible. Rob, this was his first time crewing. He’s a top class ultra runner himself. His attitude and innocent Trim boy sense of humour is infectious. Being able to look back at him in the car and know what he has overcome to be the man he is now made my efforts and problems look minuscule.

There was no quitting from any of us that week, wasn’t even a mention of it when Shermers kicked in. They were simply flawless. I have to do some bribing now to get them all to RAAM with me as I wouldn’t feel safe or confident trying it without each of them.

Race Around Ireland, 3rd place solo in 122hrs with 3hrs sleep in my first ever solo race.

Ciaran Smith Award for the fastest rider over the toughest King of the Mountains section.

52000 calories burned

83 bottles of Ensure 🤢

200+ servings of Tailwind

3o mars bars

Greatest week of my life!

Can I finish Race Across America?

If you own or know of any companies who might be interested in getting involved to get us across America and raise funds for our chosen charity please give me a shout!

It will be interesting if nothing else!!

Sanka, ya dead?

Feel the Rhythm! Feel the Rhyme! Get on up, it’s bobsled time!

The last few weeks have been self inflicted torture with the constant self doubt, fear of the unknown and pushing to the back of my mind the pain and suffering that’s inevitably coming my way. The Jamaican Bobsled team had more of a chance of winning gold than I do at finishing this race.

So why set myself up for failure?

Because I’d rather give it a go and fail miserably than sit there and never know.

If I ever had the balls to get a giant tattoo it would have to be, Roosevelts ‘The Man In The Arena’.

I read over it regularly and had it printed out and stuck on the wall during RAAM, have a read below but especially the last couple of lines in bold text:
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

I’ve always had slight trepidation of my big races, mainly because I go into them unprepared and just about wing it to the finish but I can always envisage the race and more importantly the finish line. I just can’t see the finish line with this race. I’m not saying it’s not going to happen, I’m not going into this race with a defeatist attitude, I just can’t visualise the way I always have before and it has fucked with my head.

I’ve always said I’m an extremely average athlete but I just crave finding and doing the extreme races. There isn’t a race on earth I wouldn’t sign up for in the morning, except probably the Castletown Donkey Derby! Fear is normal but this race, for whatever reason has turned me inside out. I wasn’t sleeping, I was a bollox(sorry, bigger bollox) to live with so I had to talk to someone and I did that a couple of weeks ago. I spoke to a Sports Psychologist, partly because ultra endurance athletes swear by them but mainly to see if he could help in any way possible. We had a great chat, he reassured everything I already knew about how the training has been spot on, crew is the best around, I can’t control the weather and if saddle sores or getting wiped out by a Massey Ferguson (there’ll be times I’ll be praying for this Massey) are the cause of a DNF then that’s totally fine, I can deal with that. What I can’t deal with is throwing the bike in a ditch and quitting.

I’ve tried to visualise the pain and injury, I’ve told myself to deal with it but I just couldn’t settle and for whatever reason his words of “make peace with the pain that’s coming your way and deal with them head on each time they hit”, for the first time in weeks my shoulders dropped and I was finally able to relax.

A bit late to bring this up now but having been off the bike pretty much all of last year even though I still managed The Race Donegal, Gaelforce Ultra and Ironman Wales I still think this race is a year too soon for me. If I had a few Audax or 12/24hr races under me I’d be a lot more confident heading into this but sure if my Aunt had balls she’d be my Uncle!!

I still can’t visualise the race and that’s ok but finally I feel ready to tackle it. Only seven Irish people have ever finished it solo and with a 60% – 70% failure rate the norm would be to dnf, the extraordinary would be to finish it.

So what the fuck have I to lose?

Absolutely nothing.

What have I to gain?

Absolutely everything.

Let’s roll the dice.

See you on the ramp at Trim Castle from 2pm this Sunday

“Hey Derice, ya dead man”?

“No Sanka, I’m not dead, but we have to finish the race”.

Seven weeks out!

‘The thoughts of work tomorrow’…

‘Shhhtop will ya’…

‘We go down to Lynchs for a Sunday settler?’…

‘Aye but we might stick our heads into the Race Around Ireland start line on the way?’…

As I roll off the ramp, entering whatever hell awaits me, the boys are in Lynchs sipping the finest stout in the country, trying to hold off Monday morning as long as they can. Bob Geldof may very well be an arsehole but he was right about Mondays!! By the time the lads head home I’ll have crossed the true gates of Hell or Northern Ireland as it’s also known!!

The lads head to work Monday, I should still be on the bike heading for Mamore Gap in stunning Donegal, wee Daniel is on the side of the road offering free hugs that last a bit too long if I’m being honest…

Monday comes to an end and Tuesday comes about for the lads, not much Craic of a Tuesday except for the one with the pancakes, I’m still battling on the bike, probably somewhere around Mayo maybe? ‘Oh the green and red of M’……’Shut up!!!’

Wednesday swings around, hump day as some eegits call it, the lads are dreaming of the weekend. I don’t know where in the country I am but I’m still cycling, hopefully having only slept for 4 or 5 hours at this stage and not completely embarrassing myself and the crew!?

Thursday is here, hallucinations have well and truly kicked in for the solo riders, the Healy-Raes have annexed most of Munster, bringing it under the direct rule of the Kind Kerry Kingdom and Martial Law has been declared, makes for some spicy cycling let me tell ya!!

The teams should be finishing up, we’re hopefully starting to believe we can finish this thing if all goes to plan…..

Friday is here, the boys leave work faster than Paddy Jackson leaves a Whatsapp group chat gone wrong! Myself and the crew will hopefully be taking on the last few big climbs around Wicklow and heading for home. As the boys are getting served up their last orders in Lynchs, in walk myself and the crew with our finisher medals around our necks!! (Hopefully!)

………………………….

That’s how long the race itself is, a full working week and more spent on the bike, morning, noon and night, 22hrs a day……I’m under no illusions of just how tough it will be. I don’t know if it will be as tough as 2man RAAM was considering everything that went wrong for us over there but it sure will be different.

The crew is sorted and it’s honestly an amazing crew, full of RAI and RAAM crewing experience and most of them being top endurance athletes themselves.

I’ve decided not to do it for a charity or any good cause this year as IF I finish it and qualify for Race Across America next year then I want to do that big and do it right so you’ll all be getting pestered to dig deep then!

Training has been going well, bit of a spill off the bike a couple of weeks ago and old issues with the hips/groins mean I’m struggling to throw the leg over the bike but I’m working on it and I’m confident all will be running fine come race day. The last big training block starts in the morning.

I honestly can’t wait for race day, just so I don’t have to train anymore!

2200km with 22000 meters of climbing and 132hrs to complete it!

Bring it f*ckin on!!!!

P.S. If anyone has a crew cab van they want to loan/rent us for that week let me know!!!!

Is it time to retire?

Is it time to retire?

Almost!

But not just yet.

Stupid is as stupid does!

I have a list of big races and challenges I want to do, all going well I will have them done in the next four or five years then I genuinely think it’s time to pack it in! I hope by then all itches will be scratched, I’ll have achieved a list of races no other Irish person(or any person) has achieved so what would be the point in going backwards to shorter races when I’ll have hopefully achieved, if not then at least attempted some of the toughest in the world.

This August I take on Solo Race Around Ireland. I have completed it as a 2man 2015(still hold the third ever fastest time) and was part of the first and only Irish 2man to finish Race Across America 2017 so i think I’ve earned my place to line up against the world’s best on August 25th and try hold onto them for dear life!!

RAI is 2200km non stop cycle to be completed in five days, I’m shitting myself but I honestly can’t wait to roll off the start ramp! I have a brilliant crew and they want to finish it as much as I do so I know they’ll push me beyond breaking to achieve it. Then it’s back to a bit of mountain running and gear up for the RAW 100mile ultra in the Wicklow mountains in December. I like cycling, but I don’t need to cycle. I NEED to run and I need to be up the mountains. I’ve only ran a couple of times since The Race in March and it’s killing me……

IF and I’m not using that IF for reassurance from anyone, I’m using it out of common sense and historical fact of how few finish, but if I finish RAI then I’m qualified for RAAM. If I finish free from injury and mental scarring then I would be mad not to carry the legs over to 2020 and attempt Race Across America solo, it’s the ultimate dream, if I survive that and can finish the 100miler in 20hrs I’ll qualify and try enter the Spartathlon 250km Ultra marathon a few weeks after it! Those two in themselves would be quite the year next year.

Race Around Ireland is billed as Europes toughest bike race and Race Across America is the world’s toughest so as far as I’d be concerned that would be the end of my endurance cycling as I have other races I want to try. There might be good deals going on my fancy bikes as ocean row boats are bloody expensive things!!

2021 would hopefully see myself and (I won’t use his real name for fear of him being made sleep in the shed so we’ll call him Big Andy for now!!) Big Andy become the first Irish duo to complete the Talisker Whisky Atlantic Row Challenge. Sure look, if I’ve cycled 3000miles non stop I may try row 3000miles non stop!!!

After the row then I would love to get a couple of the lads together, or by myself if they’re not dumb enough and head back to America and run the 2200miles of the Appalacian trails, covering 40-50miles a day and running like f#ck everytime we hear those strings from the movie Deliverance! Maybe throw in the MOAB 200 , UTMB and I’ll keep trying for a slot at the Barkley Marathon!

Anyway, that’s the bucket list, could be just talking out my backside. I could roll off the ramp on 25th of August , get as far as Newgrange and head for home! That’s the list, they’re the dreams, maybe they’ll remain dreams forever, who knows, but all going well and I get a sniff of a chance at any of them I’ll be ready and willing.

This craic takes up so much time and effort, it’s all consuming and it’s absolutely exhausting. I’ve been bolloxed since 2015!!! I’ll try get the list cleared and I would love to see what else I could do putting all the same efforts into something completely different, maybe attempt the Seven Summits, join our Dave in opening an Alpaca farm or more than likely park up in Lynchs bar for a couple of years. Who knows I might even make a start on that book, weren’t all great books edited on a bar stool!?

Keep an eye on the Spun Cycles social media pages for updates and I’ll try keep a regular blog/waffle piece going for those who want to read the world’s most boring blog!

Graham